Have you ever been through a breakup and are you worried that you will get bad karma for breaking someone’s heart? No matter how you feel about your breakup and the relationship you had before it broke up, let me tell you something. Your relationships create Karma. All relationships create Karma. There is a very good chance that you are with the person you are with now (or were with last) because of some Karma that you had to work out with him.
I can only speak from experience so here’s my story.
So, I once dated a guy. He was a really good guy and I loved him a lot. It was the kind of love that cracked my heart open and it was the first time that my love for another human being brought me to tears. But then, I grew older and wanted new experiences and wanted to hang out with new people so I broke that good guy’s heart and we parted ways.
Thanks to Karma, 10 years later he is back in my life but it’s not really him. This time, I AM him. And someone else is doing to me all the things that I did to him long ago.
That’s how Karma works. It gives you a chance to square up for everything you have done to others by enduring the same treatment yourself.
Karma in Kali Age
According to the Vedic scriptures and the yoga tradition, we are in Kali Yuga at the moment. Yuga means age, and Kali is the age that is charactarized by time being sped up, human lives being shorter and a lot more things happening in a lot less time. I think this applies to our Karma as well. Instead of doing someone wrong and not having to pay for it till your next life or next incarnation, in this age, you pay in one lifetime for most things.
In the case of the really nice guy who I hurt 10 years ago, I had the chance to experience what I put him through by being put in his shoes. And the thing is, I have been in the “heartbreaker’s” shoes as well, and I can’t even be angry at that person. I know that there is no other way.
There was no other way for me to have behaved back then and that’s why when it happened to me, I had to sit back and observe the identical situation from the flip side.
When you finally stop dating the same guy over and over again, you end up dating yourself
A former version of you turns up in your life for you to learn a lesson from. I suppose it’s kind of like when you become a parent and finally realize how much of a brat you were to your mom and dad. Karma in relationships allows that to happen a little sooner.
A former version of you comes along and breaks your heart in the exact same way that you broke someone else’s. You get to experience being the offender and the offended. You come full circle.
How to deal with Karma For Breaking Someone’s Heart
I wrote a whole post about this but in short, my advice here is not to freak out. You may feel like a mean, old version of you has turned up to hurt and get even with the current version you. I don’t believe it’s about Karma getting even with you. I believe that it is simply a way for you to find empathy for the one you hurt before. It is simply to feel love for them, feel their pain and most importantly, to love yourself anyway despite what you have done in the past.
Love yourself anyway.
Your actions in the past were inevitable. Those actions were destined. Just be at peace with what you did in the past no matter how many hearts you broke. You have probably experienced, first hand, what it felt like to those people when their hearts were broken. If you haven’t, you probably will soon.
Just accept it.
Just love, yourself, anyway.
If you don’t know how, start with treating yourself to a manicure. And meditation always helps when you want a more lasting kind of self-love.
With my love and acceptance,
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Originally published April 22, 2015. Updated May 22, 2020.